This morning, Tom and I learned of the loss of a dear friend. He was only forty-three years old.

The circumstances that prompted Chad’s death are sketchy and unfathomable. All we really know is that he died September 8 or 9.

The person we loved has become a memory.

***

We met Chad several years ago at our community gym in Scottsdale. He was a strong man with a broad chest and an even broader smile and zest for life.

In short order, we began to take long hikes together at Papago Park near our home. Chad would tell us about his work adventures, his previous chapters in Wisconsin and Texas, his love for the Green Bay Packers, and his greater love for his family–particularly his mother and father.

Along the trail, we shared our life philosophies: speaking our truths, doing the right thing, following our passions, telling our stories, living for today.

I know he appreciated the listening ears Tom and I provided. I also know that Chad loved us. And we most definitely loved Chad.

Chad loved music too. One day in May a few years ago, the three of us visited the Musical Instrument Museum in north Scottsdale. We had a blast playing the drums together at an interactive exhibit.

On another occasion, Tom and I helped Chad prepare to move from one Scottsdale apartment to another when his lease was up.

Chad traveled a lot in his job and was meticulous about his car. Once–when he was out of town and his car was repaired at a body shop after an accident–he asked Tom and me to drive it to our home until he returned.

We were happy to help him. I think Tom and I were his only friends in Scottsdale he trusted enough not to hot rod on the way home.

During Covid, Chad came to visit us outside our condo. We sat across from each other at safe distances. It wasn’t ideal but seeing each other and talking in person mattered. It gave us comfort.

In 2022, Chad left Arizona. He moved to Nashville, Tennessee, for a new career opportunity. Tom and I were thrilled for him, but we missed him and our hikes together. Nonetheless, we had the sense that he was happy in his new home.

In early May of 2023, Chad visited Scottsdale again to renew his friendships here. Tom and I enjoyed talking with him for an hour or so in the chairs outside our condo. We didn’t know it would be the last time we would see our friend.

Now, four months later, we are stunned. Numb. Devastated. With time, we hope to get answers to what happened to our friend.

All we really know is that in an instant he went from being a person to becoming a memory.